It is 88 degrees at 10:00 p.m. and the heat has fried my brain. The governor is likely going to call a special session on immigration, so we get to stretch some hatred out for the summer, which should be fun (not). My friend, She’sCrafty, noticed that we’ve been a little slow on the blog and submitted some unusual material to me. I’m going to post it in parts. Here’s one.
Have you ever noticed that some people are notorious for leaving their shopping carts in the middle of the damn aisle in the grocery store? Why is that? It is so annoying. I've taken to just moving them myself as they never seem to notice me standing there politely, or even when I say "excuse me." They are mesmerized by their choices of laundry detergent and fruit snacks. Have you ever noticed how many varieties of fruit snacks exist? I wonder what the machines look like that form corn syrup and artificial color into the shape of Elmo and Spiderman. My friend Todd could tell the different M&M colors apart with his eyes closed. It was uncanny.
DHP will comment on the shopping cart thing, though I think the ability to distinguish M&M colors with one’s eyes closed might be a superpower that I would like to have. Anyway, leaving the cart mid-aisle is particularly irritating when it happens at the Queen Soopers given that their aisles are so damn narrow. Luckily this rarely happens because most shoppers are hand-held basket types anyway. Particularly late at night, when folks with the munchies are shopping. I know this from experience, when often I have forgone even the basket and gone with trying to carry all my item in my hands. Cat litter is the saddest of all late night purchases (also from experience). Another rant I’d like to add is those obliviosos who don’t realize the line for the self-check forms down Aisle 4. Even worse are the fuckers in the front of the line who let the obliviosos jump line because they don’t see the line of 10 people properly waiting. Don’t worry DHP is not one of those fuckers. I always point out the idiot’s mistake. “Hello, the line is back here.” Duh.
PS – The extreme heat make DHP more irritable than usual. Look out Denver!
PPS – Good god, W is in Iraq.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Random.
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4 comments:
It is the Whole Foods Tourist that get on my last nerve. The groups of 4+ people who travel together through the aisle looking for free samples with no buggy or basket as they have no plans to buy more than a single item- if that.
I actually witnessed the following: a customer (with a cart of groceries) was asking the produce guy for advice on what type of apple would be best suited for a particular dish. The produce guy pulled a knife out of his pocket & cut a sample for the customer. The whole foods tourist lined up behind the actual customer waiting for their slice of apple.
Same Trip: Bulk Foods. Parents (also, no cart or basket) encouraging their children to munch on bags of trail mix before getting to the register where it is put on the scale.
In high school, I insisted that I had the M&M color distinguishing superpower. That was before red was back in the mix or blue even existed. I don't know if I still have my abilities, but I swear that green and yellow were more citrusy and orange being orange-y with dark and milk chocolate coatings (remember those dull brown colors?) also having distinct chocolate tastes.
I see an M&M Color identification test coming on. I suggest we hold the event during Tikkibaum's upcoming Colorado trip. If others presume to have superpowers- speak now so necessary supplies can be procured.
This weekend it was folks waiting at the cheese counter- with no plans to buy cheese- but lining up behind actual cheese purchasers for free samples.
CreamyCrafter & R Nesta M think I am being a bit snarky about the WF Tourist. Let me clarify, I have no issue with people taking advantage of the free samples. I love an orange slice while I shop. It is the large crowds that stop suddenly (in Belmar where the aisles are bigger than Queen Soopers & Cherry Creek WF) and make me stub my toe on my full basket. They should be shot.
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